one month

It is the 30th day of the month, and so it is one month since I lost Lisa.

Her eldest daughter left a message on my answering machine a couple of days ago. If I understood correctly, she has some of Lisa's ashes for me. She also made mention of getting access to a truck so that she can come up here and get some more of Lisa's things. I don't know what she thinks she'll need a truck for; I did tell her a month ago that she could have the small roll-top desk. I only use it for storing things, not as a desk, but the desk in question disassembles to a small pile and reassembles easily with an Allen wrench.

Surely she doesn't think that I'm going to let her snoop around in my house again looking for other things she might want. There is almost nothing left as it is. She, her siblings and other family cleared out nearly all of what had been Lisa's possessions.

Lisa's youngest daughter did not want much. I did let her have Lisa's dentures. She asked for them; she's a unique kid and thought that the dentures would make an interesting memento. Lisa always thought that she'd get along with Anna, but she couldn't get past the Marine thing until they met on the day of Lisa's showing. Now they are Facebook friends and get along very well.

Tonight I have to go in to work at 11 PM. Yesterday I finally got to sleep at about 5 PM - after being awake for 36 hours - but slept too well. I awoke at 1:11 AM to the sound of two alarms alarming. They were both set for before 10 PM. I called the store where I work, and they had somebody else working. He said not to worry about it but advised that I call our boss. So I did - rousing her out of what sounded like a comfortable sleep - and I apologized. I expect to get written up over this.

What the hell, I screwed up. Lisa must have been occupied elsewhere as she didn't manage to wake me either. There were five voicemail messges on my phone, about one per minute starting at 11:05 PM. I heard no alarms and no phone ringing. I was out. After I called in, satisfied that the guy who took my place had the situation in hand, I fell back to sleep and slept like a rock. I got about 12 hours of sleep overall, getting up this morning at about 7 AM.

And so tonight I gave up trying to sleep at about 5:30 PM, made a quick trip to the store for some Copenhagen and an energy drink, and brewed a pot of coffee as soon as I returned home. I can't afford to miss work like that again.

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