not again

Well, I let myself run out of antidepressants again -- because I'm a fool. At least I weaned myself off of them, to minimize withdrawal symptoms.

I called the place where I have been going for my mental health services for the last two years, and they said that I had been removed from the system because I hadn't contacted them for over six months. But, the doctor gave me a year's refills on my medication and said "come back next year." That was in February, 2013; "next year" means February, 2014, doesn't it? Why would I have contacted them within six months?

They are very busy today, so they will be looking into the situation and will call me back. In the meantime I asked them for a phone number for local mental crisis care, just in case.

I'm already irritable. Suicidal ideations won't be far behind. I need my meds.