Despite the impression that may have been made by my recent post regarding faith, I do want to believe, and I find myself more overcome with emotion during my recent prayers. Especially today.

It is a gorgeous day outside, yet here I sit in the living room. Haven't even taken the dogs around the yard yet.

I feel a sense of paralysis, dread and impending doom. Typical, of course, for someone who suffers from chronic major depression - a condition which I have been diagnosed (by many doctors) as having. I am not at all satisfied with one of the side effects of my current prescription medication, but nevertheless it is time to increase the dosage again.

Lisa wants me to talk about these issues to my doctor during my next visit. Perhaps another concoction would work better with fewer (or at least not the most bothersome) side effects. The doctor also needs to hear about what I have been told is probably serious Restless Leg Syndrome. I need a full-size mattress just for myself because my legs kick around so much during the night.

You know your RLS is bad when even the dog won't stay with you all night.

Sigh. I'm going to take the dogs out now. Maybe that will help.

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