they're big, they're here ... I hope they don't want my beer

OK, all sarcasm aside - for the moment - I just ran across this news item from Reuters:

" NEW YORK (Reuters) - Fast-food chains may be introducing more healthful menu items such as salads and major food manufacturers may be trimming portion sizes, but not everyone has joined the fight against obesity."

There is a lot more (no pun intended), but the gist of the story is that "big" folks want to be accepted for who they are. I don't have a problem with that. The problem is that there are increasing numbers of obese people, and as the term "increasing numbers" indicates, there are more all the time!

Don't get me wrong; I don't find overweight women intrinsically unattractive. There are so many dimensions to the attractiveness of a person. I've been with large women, I've been with thin women; actually, truth be told, I've been with more large than small women, but I don't think any of them have exceeded 200 pounds ... OK, maybe 250, that one time. Still, when I read stories like the one I cited above, where they express some degree of comfort with their 500 pound status - that's just wrong.

Have you ever eaten a "super-sized" or "biggie-sized" meal at a fast food restaurant? I have a hard enough time finishing the regular size, and I always make a point of telling this to the poor slug behind the counter who is Required By Corporate Law To Ask Anyway. I eat fast food maybe twice every three months, if that. I'm not being pious here; I order pizza and/or wings to be delivered to my house far more often than that.

Would I "do" a 500 pound woman? That depends. If she had beautiful eyes, a great smile, and a personality to match, I probably could. Those are the three qualities I look for in a woman. Even if some other physical characteristic drew me to her beforehand, without those three attributes I couldn't go any further in a relationship.

The real question is, could I commit to a long term relationship? With a 500-pound woman, that is? I would have to say no, if she was comfortable with her 500-pound self. That's a recipe for physical disaster on her part. Still (thinking with that testosterone again), it has been shown that people who gain great pleasure from eating also have other strong physical urges, i.e. those that produce pleasure and the release of endorphins. Thus, a short-term relationship could prove beneficial both from a quality munchies and hot sex standpoint.

If I haven't already grossed you out ... good for you. You have passed the test. Welcome to the Real World. Scary, isn't it? Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

If I have grossed you out ... I would pity you, but you would not appreciate the need for the pity. All I can say is that you need to broaden your horizons. Walk into the forest, and see the beauty that is less obvious. There are things to be appreciated that are unseen by the eye that is taken with the first bright blossom.